How To Overcome The Feeling Of Regret and Move Ahead in Life!
Regret is defined as a feeling of sadness, repentance, or disappointment over an occurrence or something that one has done or failed to do.
You are affected by regret if you keep saying or thinking- "I wish I had done this, I wish I had said that, I wish I had gone there" etc.
No matter how perfect your life feels like and no matter how much you try, you must have felt regret at least once in your life or will face a situation in future thanks to some small regrets like "I wish I had chosen strawberry flavor instead of chocolate for my ice cream!"
Some major regrets are often in the form of life decisions like education path, career, purchasing/renting a home/vehicle, and yes, choosing a life partner.
A video about the regret's meaning analyzed:-
The science of regret | Marcel Zeelenberg | TEDxCollegeofEuropeNatolin
Why Regret is Not Good?
- Makes us sad/depressed because of overthinking.
- Makes others sad when they see us sad & worry about us.
- Makes us angry by thinking we made mistakes in the past.
- Ruins our future because we are wasting the present time by overthinking on the things that can't be changed instead of doing something which can help us change the future.
Now, here are some ways by which you can overcome regret:-
For Everyday Minor Regrets-
- Move on: Small things don't require your time more than 3 minutes.
- Perhaps next time: If you're making the same kind of decision every day, you can improve the decision the next time. Example- Taking a Bus instead of a taxi to save time.
- Make notes: Start a Journal/Personal Diary and note down what mistakes you have made and what you should do the next time. You become your own mentor and teacher. A great pathway to self improvement.
- Make a habit:- If you tend to commit the same mistake repeatedly, try to make notes and improve yourself. Then make it a habit to make the right decisions daily.
For Major Life Regrets-
- Might be the best decision at that time (No need to think now): You may think that you should have done something else in a situation from your past but when that situation actually happened, you had limited resources and limited time to take a decision, and perhaps it was the best decision you could take at that time. Now you think differently because now you are wiser and have more information or skills.
-Not in your hand: Some decisions you take require you to comply with an external force or authority. Like some decisions should be accepted by your family, friends or your organization, or boss. So, you shouldn't feel guilty of decisions which were not taken entirely by you. The influence was perhaps good too and it was the best you could do.
- Can't be changed but can adjust: Some decisions once taken, can't be changed but you can help make the situation better and perhaps, everyone more comfortable or happier. Like, if you had to start a very difficult project and everyone is stressed because of it, you can help others by being compassionate and patient. If someone in your life has troubled you and you regret your time with them,take some time to heal then try talking to them and sort things out. Consult a licensed counselor or an elder to mediate.
- Perhaps happened for good: Again, you can assure yourself that whatever happened, it happened for good. You didn't take a particular career path and it was not for you, for example. You shouldn't let the decisions you did not take affect the results of the decisions you did take, that is, your current career will be badly affected if you are concentrating on your past instead of your present.
- Not the end: Some decisions do affect a lot of things but that's not the end of your life. There are many things to do and see in the life. It's not the end of the life. In fact, it's the beginning of your new life, with new decisions and new things that will happen in future.
- More chances will come: If you missed a chance before or made a bad decision, there is a high probability that you can get the same or the same type of chance in future. Like, a similar job offer or promotion or a chance of new business or scholarship for further studies, etc. The life is very big and anything is possible in future. Don't be saddened by what has happened but keep doing something and eventually, you can build a better future.
-Move on: Again, you have to remember that big decisions are necessary and important but sometimes we may commit mistakes but we have to learn from them and move on. We should learn from the past and not let the worry us much in the present.
A video about how to Overcome Regrets:
Regret, how can we move past it? | Cooper Vardy | TEDxYouth@WISS
How to avoid regrets in Life:-
* Learn from the past mistakes & make notes in your personal diary.
* Don't repeat the same mistakes.
* Plan and then act.
* Think and discuss with trusted, relevant & qualified people before making a major decision.
* Sometimes overthinking and delaying a decision can make you regret as the opportunity will pass. So, do take some time to think and discuss but don't take too long.
* Close your eyes and ask yourself- "Is this what I want to do? Will I regret this decision in future?"
The psychological phenomenon, 'regrets' are unavoidable as they're a part of the life because no matter what we do, we will not have control over some situations in our life & we will think about our past.
The only thing we can do is understand that some things cannot be changed and we have to learn lessons from our past instead of overthinking about them.
A Video about how to avoid regret:-
The Antidote to Regret | Kimberly Rich | TEDxCoeurd'Alene
Some Good Quotes About Regrets:-
Marilyn Monroe was an American actress, comedienne, singer, and model. She became one of the world's most enduring iconic figures and is remembered both for her winsome embodiment of the Hollywood actresses and her tragic personal and professional struggles within the film industry.
TED Talk by Kathryn Schulz: Don't regret regret (Safe For Work):-
By YouTuber JJ family- Live Life Without Regrets (Safe For Work):-
[YouTube Channel Link] [Video Link-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVyFyYQmMhA ]
[YouTube Channel Link] [Video Link-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVyFyYQmMhA ]
By Mr GaryVee (Short & Safe For Work):-
Conclusion:-
So, take this life and do something you love, do something your parents, friends and YOU will be proud of. We only get life once so no use of regret and sadness. When you are sad, look at those people who have less than you and be comforted. When you are happy, look at those who have more than you to remain humble.“If we spend our time with regrets over yesterday, and worries over what might happen tomorrow, we have no today in which to live."- Thomas Sowell
Thanks for reading. Have a beautiful life ahead!
If interested, many Good Quotes can be found at WiseOldSayings site
If interested, many Good Quotes can be found at WiseOldSayings site
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Great going Darshan👍👍--CA Jayshree Karve
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Karve ma'am for reading my blog posts and motivating me. I am happy to know that you like what I have written. I will continue to write good and helpful content for all.
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